T O P

i hate family gatherings

i hate family gatherings

lovesaqaba

It's your birthday and graduation party. Insist you should be able to pick the meal.


Comfortable_Intern57

I've decided not to do Thanksgiving anymore because I pretty much have to cook an entire Thanksgiving meal on my own just to go over to someone else's house. So I haul several bags of food for myself and my daughter. Nobody but my sister makes anything vegan. One time a cousin says she would but never did. I'm just sick of it. I'm sick of seeing the dead animal corpses and everyone rubbing their hands together around it like psychopaths. I might do Christmas, but that's it. Not other family gatherings. Also, no birthdays anymore, but luckily my daughter is 18 now so we don't get invited to them anyway.


summitcreature

My girlfriend and I make athletic adventure trips for Thanksgiving vacation. Wayyyyy better than watching friends eat turkey.


miloops

Can we all join you? Vegan family athletic adventure trips!


cutesybread

i was thinking about opting out of thanksgiving as well, it's just not something that is enjoyable for me, so i don't know if i'll go. i just think my parents will be offended and mad about it, and they're still paying for my college, so idk lol


Argent_Amber

That's messed up on more than a vegan level. Would they neglect to make food for someone who was allergic to X ingredient? Or, imagine if they threw a birthday party for a Jewish or Muslim person, and everything had varying amounts of pig body parts in it? You don't do meat, dairy, eggs, etc., yet they ignore your need for food without those things. I'm sorry they're treating you like that. I think you'd be more than justified to demand vegan food or you aren't going. It's not that hard to leave the bodies out of their food once in a while.


cutesybread

thank you! i feel the same way, some of the people in my family have celiac's disease, so it's pretty serious and even they don't seem to understand? it's frustrating, and not that hard to leave out animal products for one gathering. i've given up for now because i'm tired of arguing at the moment


Argent_Amber

Yeah, I get ya.


Argent_Amber

LOL So. Somebody hit me up with a private message about what I posted here. It's amazing. Wonder why they didn't just reply in here in the open. The conversation is really long and arguey though, so I don't think I can put it here. Maybe r/vegancirclejerk or something, I don't know. It primarily boils down to only things from bodies are good, plants are icky-yucko, I don't want to try, and animals aren't humans. Also, vegans are self-absorbed hypocrites. It's great.


QueenRagga

Congratulations on your graduation and happy birthday. Yeah I feel you. It's hard being a vegan out here. Wego to less social things than before. I'm sorry that it's like this but I'm so grateful for other kind people like you. I don't have much to say because it's tough to change others. One thing we did was to have one of the gatherings at our house where we were in charge. Mother's day was at our house and we made vegan lasagna. We asked that people respect our home and not bring animal products. The meal was great and we didn't get any complaints.


cutesybread

thank you :) i think once i've got my own place and start holding gatherings myself, i'll be doing the same thing because i really don't want any of that stuff being brought into my own household


dumnezero

I once received a birthday cake from my neighbor friend (almost family) for my birthday, at their place; I wasn't celebrating it, so they invited me. It wasn't a plant-based cake, so they ate it with their family while I was there just having a drink.


cutesybread

yikes, i'm sorry about that, that's kinda messed up


keroppipikkikoroppi

This isn’t saying anything that hasn’t been said, but if someone throws you a party with foods you can’t eat, the party’s not for you. It’s for them. Good luck with however you decide to handle it.


Light_Lord

I don't go to family gatherings unless everything is vegan (it never is), can't be fucked with that shit.


grathanich

Being discriminated in such gatherings and gawked at for being such a "radical" person comes with the package. However, if your friends and family really care about you, they SHOULD at least cook something for you and definitely not ask/coerce you into eating or tasting animal products. ​ It's okay for them to consider it strange, it's not okay for them to behave differently to you because you have a different lifestyle.


CraigJDuffy

I’ve had similar - especially at work events where catering is provided. I’ve started listing that I have a dairy, eggs, chicken, beef, pork, and fish allergy rather than just saying I have a dietary preference. Gets taken far more seriously.


MigraineZero

We need a vegan community to have local festivities with!


cutesybread

i'd love that, i don't have any vegan friends so that would be so nice


MigraineZero

Me too! It's hard 🌼


wanttono

why dont u have a picnic and only have vegan . see how they like it


ultrarunnervegan

Similar situation here… it’s my moms birthday today and when I asked what we’re doing to celebrate I found out my sister has already ordered a non-vegan non-gluten free cake(fiancé is allergic) and they’re having pork loin for dinner… I just told them I’m not coming and I’ll bring her her present another day. My mom has been one of the most accommodating of our vegan diet and she would have been happy to have a vegan meal. I’m mostly upset my sister just didn’t consider the other half of the family at all.


cutesybread

i'm sorry :( people always say "it must be so hard to be a vegan" and they don't even realize that it's not because of not being able to eat certain foods, its's the social aspect of it and how others treat you because of it