I don’t know how to move on from the fact that I never got a normal childhood.
By - Rodentsarecute
You can mourn for your childhood. And for the things you nevef got, buy them and do them. If you want to live the one you missed then you can. Nothings stopping you. Never went on a carasel? Never had a toy bought for you? Do it! Mourn and move forward. You and your inner child need to work together to function. So spoil your inner child until you can
This is a much shorter version of what I said! Lol. The best way (that worked for me, not necessarily for everyone) to come to terms with not getting the childhood you wanted is to give it to yourself now that you have the freedom to!
Decide the adult you wanna be. Who do you want to be? It hurts sometimes, yeah. But all we can do is try to make ourselves happy from now on. What do you need to do to be happy, and work towards that. If I couldn’t then, I can at least try to make the best of now.
Accept it. And help other children.
Honestly struggling with this one. I've be through a period of mourning my childhood as well as the one I never had, as well as NC with my mother l. Damn these narc causing so much pain. How can one damaged person cause so much pain and damage to so many others? It's not fair.
You have to move on. Otherwise you end up like Michael Jackson. Therapy helps.
therapy helps, it is easier to deal with trauma when you have a guide through all this
my therapist helped me emotionally relive some of bad things that happened when i was a kid, it wasn't easy, it wasn't pleasant, but i remembered how it used to be back then and when i confronted my memories now i was not a child anymore, i was an adult, so i was able to battle some of my demons, overcome them and put them to rest. and every time after i eventually stopped crying i felt much calmer and at peace....
Imagine a childhood that you deserved, good memories instead of the bad…and know you deserved that. Keep away from anyone now that may do something negative to trigger your bad experiences. Spread good seeds of positivity to anyone you know…bc everyone deserves that happy childhood you made up for yourself. Live your life NOW as if you had that wonderful childhood. This gets easier with time.
Oh shit I can actually help with this one!! I've been struggling with a lot of these same feelings, having a sorta grief over the childhood I never got. My issues are trans-themed, that's a big reason I never got the childhood I wanted, but I think you could adapt my solution to any number of issues. (Your mileage may vary of course I'm not a therapist this is just what I've found success with)
So I like to think of it in terms of being two people: the person I am now, and the kid I never got to be. There's no changing the childhood I got, it's come and gone and led me to be the person I am today. But I got to thinking, the best way I can reclaim that childhood and give myself the support and care I never got is to give that support, and live my life in a way that would make that child I never got to be happy. I started thinking "had I gotten the childhood I wanted and deserved, what would it have been like? Who would I have become? What kinda support would I have gotten?" Once I started answering those questions, the best way to get the childhood I never got was to give it to myself now.
Part of the childhood I deserved involves tacit support about being queer from adults in my life, the chance to experiment with media and toys I didn't get as a kid, and overall support about my feelings. The way that I reclaim that support I never got is by doing those things "for the kid I never got to be". I wear pride pins on my hat at work now, because the kid I never got to be deserves to have someone in her life that's proud of her for being herself. I bought myself some dolls, because as a kid I wanted them and never got to play with them. I also got myself an Easy-Bake Oven, because I remember getting yelled at because that was a girl's toy, and that little girl deserved an Easy-Bake Oven.
For me, the way that I dealt with not getting the childhood I wanted was to give it to myself.