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PM-me-ur-kittenz

A year ago two days ago was the last time I stood on stage as a musician. This was in Berlin, Germany. We all knew shutdowns were coming so the bartender locked the doors and we all had a shot and talked and speculated about how long things would take to get back to "normal". A year later and my career as a musician is completely gone, over, donezo, will never be coming back. It took a minute to come to terms with the new reality and now I'm OK with it, but trying to figure out a completely new "covid-proof" career is a struggle.


lunarmadz

Hard to believe a year ago today I went to my last day of high school ever and didn’t know it. So grateful that while I’ve missed out on this freshman year of college I hopefully get the other 3! Quite a few of my friends were vaccinated today!!


klg301

A year ago yesterday was the date when my husband and I went into lockdown in NYC. It was also the day that we moved into our new apartment in Brooklyn. Fast forward one year. Yesterday, I got my first dose of the vaccine! 2020 has been the most challenging year of my life — but hope no longer feels so remote.


Newborn1234

A year ago my first child was born and now I struggle to separate what in life has changed because I became a parent, and what changed because of the virus. Very strange. I've not been into the office for over a year, I'll never go back full time thank god but I would do pretty much anything to have some time away from home a few days a week. I hope we are nearly at the end...


yorkiepie

I’m an archivist and I’ve spent time studying the Spanish flu pandemic of 1918-1919, which has been known as a “forgotten” pandemic. I never understood how something so major could be essentially forgotten in only a hundred years. I think I understand it now. There’s nothing I want to do more than stop talking and thinking about covid. It’s too emotionally painful and draining. And I’m not looking forward to all of the think pieces we’re going to subjected to for the rest of our lives.


IchbineineKartoffel1

I remember following the news in Italy on this sub in February and realizing this thing is going to have a huge impact on life for everyone. I remember I told my parents my view and they didn't think things will get as bad as they did. A few weeks later, my roommate in middle of a class told me that the NBA shutdown. In that moment I realized things will be so fucked.


theenkos

Same for me ... but the worst part is that I’m Italian and I was telling everyone that we were not ready


abhora_ratio

A lot of us were telling people we are not ready for what is to come. Most did not believe. Some did. I remember feeling sorrow when they said "you were so right". I wish I wasn't..


theenkos

I wish it too.. after 1 year my I’m starting to feel drained by this situation made by cyclical lockdowns and restrictions


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adotmatrix

Your post or comment has been removed because * **You should contribute only high-quality information.** We require that users submit reliable, fact-based information to the subreddit and provide an English translation for an article in the comments if necessary. A post or comment that does not contain high quality sources or information or is an opinion article will be removed. ([More Information](https://www.reddit.com/r/Coronavirus/wiki/rules#wiki_rule_5.3A_keep_information_quality_high)) *If you believe we made a mistake, please [message the moderators](/message/compose?to=/r/Coronavirus).*


RealNaked64

I'm very late to this post, but I wanted to post because it resonated with me. I was one of those people in Jan/Feb saying it was just a flu and it's one of those "fads" that the media freaks out about every year, but dies down and we never hear from it again. Early March, my coworkers were trying to fight to have us work from home. Not respecting the danger or gravity of the situation, I joined in for fighting for work from home too. I didn't care about the virus, I just wanted to be at home away from my boss! My family and I went on weekend vacation without a care in the world; on our way home, the ski resort started talks of shutting down. Things were getting a bit more anxious, but my little corner of NJ still felt untouchable. The general jist of my circle was: "80 confirmed cases in NYC? Not bad at all!" March 11th came and the NBA shut down. Even then, I wasn't starting to worry, I just found it odd that a multi-billion dollar sports league would shut down over something so "minor". My SO, who now takes the pandemic more seriously than anyone I know, asked to go out to a bar on March 14th! Come the 18th and my company finally caved, letting us work from home starting the next day. I was beyond hyped. Our workload slowed down and our bosses didn't care, so this was a dream come true! I'd wake up, finish all of my work for the day before lunch, work out and play video games all day. Somehow, even in an NJ state of emergency, I still wasn't worried. Also, masks still weren't mandatory! My buddy and I went camping at a site in PA that weekend, just staying one night. It was beautiful outside but the park was basically empty. The next morning, the campsite caretaker came around and booted everyone out, all park systems were now closed. Up to late April, no one in my circle of friends and family had gotten the virus, but people were still beginning to be more cautious. By the end of April, I hadn't left my house in over 3 weeks and hadn't seen my friends in a month. From a story perspective, it would definitely sound more interesting to have some big event that made me realize how serious things were. But what made me finally snap out of it wasn't one big thing, it hit me one day out of the blue. I was just sitting there after eating lunch and it suddenly clicked: this virus isn't just going away, this virus is actually killing people, what are we going to do? I'm not going to sit and pretend my life was made difficult by Covid, I was one of the lucky ones. However, while nothing overtly bad happened to me like the death of a parent, it was still death by a thousand cuts. I lost my job, my grandpa, my SO's grandpa, my neighbor, half of my mom's family was sick and she needed surgery herself. This post just feels like a weight coming off of my shoulders, 2020 was tough as hell on everyone and I am overjoyed that there is a light at the end of the tunnel with this vaccine rollout.


TotallyNotABot_Shhhh

A year ago today I was freaking out in a prepared sort of way as a server in a restaurant in a tourist trap outlet mall. I’m thankful for the Reddit community because I saw the signs here well before it hit MSM, so we had our essentials stocked, money saved, and cash on hand. A year later I’m in a different job, with security for my future, just got my 1st shot of moderna yesterday (woohoo!) and this stimulus money will be going towards much needed repairs on our house. Had it not been for Reddit I think I would have been in a different place completely when this first hit. Thanks random strangers from all over the world, who shared what was going on before our own country prepared us!


PsychologicalCase10

It all happened so fast last year. I remember hearing about it in Jan/Feb, thinking this was gonna be ebola. A few cases here and there but no mass death, no shutdowns, life would go on. I was in my first year of teaching. Then I remember March 11th. I remember that night the NBA shutdown. I remember a few NBA teams and NHL teams on the West Coast talking about playing without fans. Never thought both leagues would shutdown within 24 hours of each other. Then I got a CNN notification that Tom Hanks and Rita Wilson tested positive. That combined with the NBA shutting down made me think this was serious. A few says later, our Governor, McMaster, shut down all schools so I had to teach from home. It all happened so fast yet that week. Sunday felt like any normal week but every thing changed by Saturday.


cealchylle

March 11th was the last day I worked in my office. I remember locking up my cabinets just in case and wondering when I'd be back. I haven't been back since. I had no idea it was the same day the pandemic was declared!


questionname

I was reflecting on the last year, then decided to pull up photos, it’s surprising that such an impactful event that I totally misremembered it. Like there’s no pictures of my family with masks when outdoors in a park in March. Also we were outdoors a lot more than I remembered, granted it was always outdoor parks or forests. I wish I had kept better diary of this historical event. Also reflecting on what decision we did right and what we didn’t do right, in case for the next pandemic. We scrambled to find masks for adults and kids, so would have that in stock at all times. And maybe consider moving out of the city to the rural country were parents live. We were on the fence about it and probably would be better if we had, especially if pandemic was worse. Otherwise, it had been a year of change. I found out who my friends are and aren’t. Made $1M day trading GameStop stock. Living healthier with better eating, sleeping, and running.


Kriztauf

If you ever decide to go on a money diet. I'll gladly eat your money for you


SunnyBunchy

I work in a grocery store and had been hearing news of the virus a few weeks prior to the pandemic declaration. A few people asked about face masks and hand sanitizer here and there but the number of people asking increased as the days went on. Then everything started shutting down, and people were being sent home. My store became hell on Earth. Hordes of panicked people coming in and buying up all the toilet paper, Clorox wipes, and essential food. I remember stocking up the freezer full of frozen veggies and people were just snatching packs from the boxes. My work made us a lunch every day for the first month. People were thanking us and calling us heroes, our paychecks saw a $2 increase an hour. However the lunches stopped, our increase went away a few months later, and we were forgotten again. I took every precaution to avoid getting sick. Wore my mask, sanitized, and stayed home when I could. Then in November I tested positive for covid. I quarantined immediately with my fiance who also tested positive. We have thankfully recovered although I still experience a phantom cigarette smoke smell and my taste and smell aren't as strong as they used to be. My fiance was laid off from his job last month (who has thankfully found a new one) so he was no longer considered essential. Now the vaccines are being administered but the county has not prioritized grocery or other non medical essential workers for the vaccine. Thankfully I still have antibodies but not sure for how much longer.


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freechurro824

I hope you can get back to campus this fall. College is such a great time in life. I feel for the kids that had to miss some of that.


Sneaky_shlomo

I’m in a big city in the US that was hit hard in March/April 2020. In late January, our local news mentioned something about a mysterious virus in China. I’m not one to freak out over news headlines but I told my buddy, who was next to me, something like, “Do you see this? Just imagine if this spreads the way they’re saying it is.” He like, many people here, said “Meh, it’s China, they have all kinds of stuff there”. Fast forward to March and everyone was sent home from the office because we had two positive cases, two dudes who sat in my vicinity. I would say most people in my city took it very seriously.


[deleted]

I remember I was doing some work fairly close to home in January. Still had some Christmas chocolate left over and took some in and put it on the table in the little office we have in that particular building. Just me and one other colleague. I was in a good mood because of the relatively short commute and was joking with her that it felt like the start of a cliché zombie flick, where the news is always playing clips of reports about strange riots and such but everybody ignores it except for that one conspiracy theory guy. Little did I know what an apt analogy that would turn out to be. A little more than a year on, I've been through a lot of fear, like many of us have, but my overwhelming emotion right now is hope and optimism. We're in the UK; both my wife and I have been vaccinated. Neither of us lost our job and, in fact, I'm gunning for a promotion later in the year. Kids both safe and happy, eldest back at school now. I know I'm speaking from a position of privilege and there's a lot of shit going on right now with post covid economic fallout and brexit only just getting going but I just can't help feel that optimism still. The sun is shining right now; pubs reopen in about a month's time. The Euros (major international football tournament for the North Americans reading) are coming up and England might get to host the whole thing. Impossible to explain to the non Europeans just what a big deal that could be; 2012 all over again, a real chance to rebuild some unity and happiness in this deeply divided country. Even if they don't there is still the prospect of England and Scotland playing at packed stadia in June whilst the nation watches on from pubs and gardens and living rooms..... *chef's kiss* Football (soccer) heals all. Can't wait


tee-dog1996

Tomorrow is my birthday. Last year my birthday ‘party’ was the last real social gathering I had before lockdown measures were enforced. It was a pretty low key affair, just half a dozen of us eating pizza, drinking and watching shitty movies all night. It was a really good evening. After that we all went home, and over the next few days as the news grew worse and worse we knew we couldn’t do gatherings like that anymore. Then shortly after that lockdown rules came in. It would take too long to explain everything I’ve been through since, but this has been a very bad year. I’ve changed a lot as a person through it, and I have mixed feelings about things opening up again. I’m mostly really looking forward to it (I’m in the UK, my friends and I all have 21st of June marked on our calendars), but part of me feels institutionalised at this point, and I do wonder how going back will really feel. Today is a day of reflection though for sure.


PsychologicalCase10

My friend’s birthday was yesterday and we were reflecting on her birthday last year. That was the last time my friends and I got all together like that. We’ve all seen each other here and there, but normally one on one.


GameOfThrownaws

It's so weird thinking back to that time. I remember in late February, my office starting putting out hand sanitizer and telling people to socially distance. I found it so silly, because my coworkers don't even wash their hands when we go out for lunch, not to mention the desks are closer than 6 feet apart anyway. Nobody really changed anything, other than any time someone sneezed or sniffled, someone would always nervously ask "are you sick...?" A few weeks later the office was closing for "2 weeks to flatten the curve". I packed up my laptop just like I do every day when I'm going to be doing something from home. I didn't even bring my mouse and keyboard. It's just two weeks. I left about a hundred bucks worth of K cups and snacks in my desk. It's just two weeks, right? Every spring at my office, we watch the families of baby quail run around outside and grow up into adults. As I left the building, I mused that I might not see those little guys again this year, they'll probably all be gone by the time I come back here. But it's just two weeks, right? Maybe they'll still be around. That was over a year ago. It's insane to think back about how happy and normal my life was then, and how I took it all for granted. It feels like looking back at someone else's happy little life. Like it wasn't even me. I've lost and sacrificed so much that I don't even feel like the same person anymore. I wonder if I ever will.


chloemonet

I don’t know how I’m going to be able to get over the anxiety that’s grown in the past year. My partner and I both will be fully vaccinated by the end of the month. We’re planning on seeing our fully vaccinated family soon after, and some friends have planned on visiting this summer. However, as someone who is high risk I don’t know how to switch off my “If you catch Covid you’ll probably die” mindset. I’ve struggled a little bit with anxiety in the past but I’ve always been pretty lucky in the mental health arena, but I think I may struggle to truly feel safe again.


FluffyCustomer6

Perhaps some prudent planning may help ease some of your anxiety? I am going to add a surgical mask to my purse “supply bag”, along with the usual tissue, aspirin, etc. I’m also probably still going to continue doing my shopping early in the day. As time goes on I’ll see how I feel about being with larger crowds. But to be honest I never liked crowds in the first place so your needs may differ. Best of luck, we are all navigating through this together.


Argos_the_Dog

If it's any small comfort you certainly aren't alone in this. I think large numbers of people are going to need help and support confronting the psychological fallout of Covid.


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abhora_ratio

Don't blame your country so bad. If you ask other people from other countries they will say the same. There wasn't a "pandemic guidebook" until now. Only some guidances and prcedures each country would take. But look at the bigger picture: never before this pandemic did the community of researchers, governments or civic society collaborated at such a huge scale. Was it hard? Yes. Did they always agree? No. Some have failed our trust? Yes. Some have been real heroes? Yes. The scale of this pandemic was proportionally direct to the scale of human collaboration. That's huge if you think about it.. :)


xboxfan34

Having Donald Dickhead as our president really didn't help matters either, but thankfully now we have someone who is actually competent as our leader.


neatmd

Yeah my gf and I live in Asia right now, it's sad to see how badly the US failed for how many resources it has. The people there are not ready for a real pandemic, this was not even close to a worst case scenario.


colvi

I’m sorry but it was a failed nation under Twitter rant man, things will get better.


[deleted]

I sure as hell hope so that we do better. Nearly 600,000 people died because the movie idiocracy became true.


Luckychunk

I'm finding myself revisiting feelings of the beginning of the pandemic, mixed in today with feelings of optimism for the future. I'm scheduled for my first vaccine this week. A year ago I bought $600 of food for myself. I did not go to a grocery store for three months. I was put on furlough two weeks into the pandemic. Life became bleak very quick. A number of life changes and an accident sent me further down. I find myself repeating how I felt last March right now. I'm doing some of the same routines, listening to some of the same music. I associate music with some of the more tragic periods in my life, and this was a period I'd like to forget, but the music is creeping back. It might be my way to say goodbye to this last year, and prepare myself for the next chapter. I do have hope for our future.


supermanfan122508

I remember when the first few cases started hitting the US. I remember the "It'll just disappear" speech. I was at a Mexican restaurant with my ex. She said I was concerned about nothing. Then, though the entirety of the pandemic, she called me paranoid because I take precautions and didn't/don't do anything unnecessarily risky. Sorry I don't wanna die from something I have the power to prevent dying from?


PsychologicalCase10

I was never so much worried about myself dying, as I’m 24 with no conditions. I would have been fine. I was more worried about getting it and giving it to my middle-aged parents.


colvi

Sorry to say this but your ex is stupid. I did the same as you, my wife did the same as your ex and even made fun of me at times. She ended up getting covid, I ended up avoiding getting covid. Sometimes it’s better to be safe than sorry.


urbanpounder

I remember telling my dad about the mysterious virus going around in China. He told me not to worry about it and here we are :)


apartmentshark

I was hearing rumors of nationwide total lockdowns - as in no one leaving their house - and I called my boyfriend of a whole 2 months to ask if he’d come over before that happened. He was happy to and even though the rumor was false, we’re still together and have made the absolute best of this shit year, celebrating every occasion we could think of.


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adotmatrix

Your post or comment has been removed because * **You should contribute only high-quality information.** We require that users submit reliable, fact-based information to the subreddit and provide an English translation for an article in the comments if necessary. A post or comment that does not contain high quality sources or information or is an opinion article will be removed. ([More Information](https://www.reddit.com/r/Coronavirus/wiki/rules#wiki_rule_5.3A_keep_information_quality_high)) *If you believe we made a mistake, please [message the moderators](/message/compose?to=/r/Coronavirus).*


hdpq

I’ve thought about this a ton over the past few weeks. I remember my wife mentioning Covid to me maybe in early to mid January. I blew her off and told her it can’t be worse than the seasonal flu. A few weeks later, a new coworker started next to me. We sit in an open floor plan, so he’s no more than 3 feet from me, if that. On Wednesday or Thursday of that week, he calls me up and asks how to login to the VPN. I didn’t know anything else and I helped him for a bit. A little while later, he calls another coworker and asks the same thing. After my other coworker hung up with him, I asked him what was up with that ... and he told me N had to quarantine for 2 weeks. When he was between jobs, he visited his family in China. Our company instituted a mandatory quarantine for anybody that had been in China. Yikes. By early February, local and National media started picking up on COVID though life was going on as usual. Basketball games on the weekends, dining in at fast food joints after karate, and grocery store and Costco runs on the weekends. In late February we flew down to Houston to visit Johnson Space Center. On our flight down, a family with young kids had face masks on. My wife commented that she wasn’t sure if those masks were on to protect themselves or to protect us. A few days later we started seeing more and more stuff starting to *change* due to concerns about COVID. The emails from our school district started mentioning that they were in communication with the county and staying in school was the best course of action. A few days later, the district banned everybody except staff and students from entering the school. My sons school recital was filmed and we could only watch via YouTube. Sometime that day or the next day, the district closed schools until after spring break. Our governor stepped in and closed schools across the state later that day as well for the same time period. School was going remote for a few weeks. For me, work was getting a bit nuttier. My company didn’t say anything about working from home when we left the office a year ago today, but mentally we we knew we weren’t showing up on Monday. Either a year ago tonight or on Saturday, I was pulled into a very high visibility project to position ourselves very well with the new PPP funds being released. I worked probably 60-70 hours on that project in a week. That Saturday we received communication that office was being split in half with one group working from home while the other was in the office. More details would be provided later. On Sunday, we received further communication that they decided to close down the office for everybody but a small number of essential employees. With everybody using the VPN on Monday, stuff was moving .. slow. To be honest, the first week is a bit of a blur at this point. Primary because I was working a TON, my kids were home trying to adjust to new school, and everything outside was ... not pretty. Admittedly, I’ve been lucky. My lifestyle improved overall. Starting sometime in May, I started to take advantage of the lack of commute and started riding my bicycle for what started as a quick 30 minute ride which by the end of summer turned into a 60 minute ride everyday. I ended up buying a Peloton in the fall and between my bicycle and Peloton, I rode over 1800 miles on my bike. That was the most I'd probably ridden in my life ... and I'm already 900 miles YTD into 2021. Work started improving quite a bit as well. The project I’d been hired for started off around April 2020 and we have been pushing through since. I haven’t put in more than 40-45 hours a week.


awfulsome

a year ago me and my family were out wating dinner for my sister's and my birthdays. my sister knew about the imminent lockdown and that it would be our last chance to dine out together for some time. today we dined out again celebrating our birthdays, all of us vaccinated at least partially (2 completely), planning vacations for the year knowing this dreadful chapter to our lives is drawing to a close.


indarkwaters

I remember keeping an eye on the pandemic through this sub. It was December when my family really toned things down in terms of get togethers, eating out and general nonchalance of the life before covid. I was very concerned. It became increasingly surreal when wuhan was in lock down and full blown twilight zone when it migrated to Italy and there were freezer trucks and makeshift morgues. I remember a family member advising to stock up on foodstuffs (and while I thought they were being alarmist, I didn’t want to take any chances) and we made a Costco trip the week before the national toilet paper crisis. Stores were empty. I did all the shopping, didn’t want my immunocompromised husband going anywhere. I remember constant group texts going back and forth reminding family about taking things seriously, sharing articles and cases. I was extremely worried for my dad who has COPD and his inability to stay home due to an innate restlessness. I had developed a sense of anxiety because I was constantly expecting bad news. Summer came and went in general quarantine and some family arguments about contact, we made it through on that side of the family, but we buckled down again for Fall and Winter with the oncoming flu season. As of now some of my family was able to get fully vaccinated, so that’s helped with the anxiety. Yet, after a full year of being cautious my sibling got infected and nephews are also sick just a week before his vaccination was scheduled to be administered. I am very anxious again. It’s been a constant mental tug of war to check yourself when you start feeling relaxed. And this week has been a reminder not to let your guard down and it only takes one moron to fuck it up for the rest of us. So many of us are shells of our former selves, living in a strange Netflix limbo, I’m not sure many of us can go back to being social butterflies as we have all become introverts. Then I read stories of families who have gone through so much pain and despair and I am grateful and sobered.


FluffyCustomer6

I was feeling more relaxed but was still careful. Then last week my coworker and her whole family were diagnosed with the virus, and they were pretty vigilant. So you are right, can’t yet let our guard down. I hope you and yours are doing ok and your family members are on the mend.


indarkwaters

Those of us fully vaccinated +2 weeks did not get infected after contact. So that’s good. Stay safe. Get vaccinated as soon as you are able. And thank you.


Allidish

I was so afraid. I was 7 months pregnant at the time, and working doing child care for a gym. Kids kept coming in sick. My husband is type one diabetic and I was so scared of bringing the sickness home to him. I ended up telling my work I couldn’t keep coming in about two days before the state shut down. Aside from fear of death I was also thinking of all the things I would miss, 3 birthdays and my baby shower were all in canceled in the first 2 weeks. I had to go to all my doctors appointments alone and was told my husband might not be allowed to be with me in the hospital when I gave birth. When my daughter was born he was with me but I couldn’t show her to my family. We were so isolated. I was so sure when I chose to have a baby that my big happy family would be there to support me. I’ve always been a little scared of the tiniest babies. Afraid I’d do something wrong. My husband was great but I needed more help. He was working long hours from home and I was just alone with the baby. It was very stressful. I’ve missed so much the last year. My parents moved, and I couldn’t help them. We visited once for 20 min with masks on to see the house and that was it. My brother and sister-in-law took over my parents old house and I can’t help decorate or paint. I’ve missed my nieces second birthday and will probably miss her third. I cook, clean, watch the baby, repeat. And I’m going slowly mad. I miss my family so so much. And somehow it feels so much worse that they live 10 minutes from here. I am excited about the Vaccine. I know normal life will be able to start again soon. I just haven’t been this stir crazy since the first weeks of the pandemic.


beckysma

We are nearing the finish line. Hang in there!! I can't imagine how stressful this was/is with a new baby.


almostbig

I was going through hell because of a hard breakup, my abusive ex gf made me a shell of my former self. Honestly, I felt like 2 weeks of not having any contact with her would do me good. It did. But then... you know. Wish I could go back to 2019, and not feel like dying everyday again.


FluffyCustomer6

Please care of yourself, spring is coming!


supermanfan122508

I hope you're doing better!


[deleted]

I knew when my entire office was abuzz with remote work discussions on Friday, March 13, 2020, and I was terrified I would lose my job. I pumped gas on the way home and was afraid I had contaminated my hands. My boyfriend and I went to Chili’s for dinner, a sit down meal that became takeout when I could not endure the fear of being in the dining room. In 24 hours I went from wanting desperately to keep working in person (there wasn’t really a way to do it remotely, as a temp secretary), to being terrified to go back to the office, and then by Sunday relieved that I was told not to report in on Monday (two weeks became….well, you know).


[deleted]

I did acid for the first time the night everything shut down. It made the whole thing feel even more surreal. Also I still remember going to sleep and waking up in the middle of the night to Tom Hanks has covid! Stuff and then a flurry of emails about covid-19 response from random ass places


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adotmatrix

Your post or comment has been removed because * **You should contribute only high-quality information.** We require that users submit reliable, fact-based information to the subreddit and provide an English translation for an article in the comments if necessary. A post or comment that does not contain high quality sources or information or is an opinion article will be removed. ([More Information](https://www.reddit.com/r/Coronavirus/wiki/rules#wiki_rule_5.3A_keep_information_quality_high)) *If you believe we made a mistake, please [message the moderators](/message/compose?to=/r/Coronavirus).*


-SPOF

My daughter was born the day before the pandemic. The world just changed for me twice...


FluffyCustomer6

No kidding! Hope you are all doing well!


owlflowers

I was panicking. I first heard about a case that happened at the school down the street from me. One student tested positive, and I thought, "oh my God, it's already in my hometown." A little over a week later, my whole job was shut down (I work at an assisted living home) and everyone had to be in their rooms. It was, and still is, a scary time.


lyralevin

A year ago, I was at work in my after school program when my boss came in, gathered all of us teachers and said that we would be starting spring break a week early, and that there was a likelihood we wouldn’t be back until April. I remember feeling kind of thrilled in an “oh my god this is history being made” sort of way, but fully expecting that yes, we’d be back in a month. We told the kids that spring break was starting early, and most of them were very excited. I never thought that it’d be more than a full year since the last time I saw those kids in person. I think of them every day.


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adotmatrix

Your post or comment has been removed because * **You should contribute only high-quality information.** We require that users submit reliable, fact-based information to the subreddit and provide an English translation for an article in the comments if necessary. A post or comment that does not contain high quality sources or information or is an opinion article will be removed. ([More Information](https://www.reddit.com/r/Coronavirus/wiki/rules#wiki_rule_5.3A_keep_information_quality_high)) *If you believe we made a mistake, please [message the moderators](/message/compose?to=/r/Coronavirus).*


morosco

For me personally, the risk of getting COVID wasn't worth the collateral losses of experiences, time with friends and family, the eroding of support networks, the general day to day malaise, etc. Anything short of a ventilator - which was possible, but not any more likely than any of other terrible things that could have happened to me this year - I'd take the COVID. Though I also recognize that I had a moral responsibility to protect more vulnerable people. That's much harder to measure the risk of, and the value of sacrificing so much for that risk. Now I'm on the borderline of not caring anymore.


agreeingstorm9

In the past 12 mos I have been to 6 or 7 different funerals. I've lost count. Some virtual. Some in person. All of them people who could still be alive today if not for covid. Some died of covid. Others died of other things that they neglected because of covid. The last one was for a woman who found several lumps a year ago but put off going to the doctor because they were flooded with covid patients and she didn't want to catch it. It was cancer. By the time she made it in, there wasn't much they could do. If not for covid she might still be around. And for every funeral I went to there were two or three others who ended up in the hospital and I spent sleepless nights wondering if they were going to make it. An older man who is a grandfather figure to me fell a few days ago and is now in the hospital. I wouldn't worry about it too much because old people fall and end up hospitalized all the time. But what if he gets covid while he's there? Personally I'm the opposite of you. I wish people had taken it more seriously. It's just a single year of life. If people took it more seriously maybe I wouldn't have had to go to so many funerals.


morosco

>It's just a single year of life One year of life (actually we're into year 2 now), and however long it takes for my mental health and support systems and social circle to recover, if they ever do. Part of the toll is just not caring any more, and resenting being preached to by people like you even though I DID take it seriously. It's impossible to try to be honest about these tolls without someone going after you. Which just pushes me further down. And why are you going in-person funerals, if so you're righteous about this? I wouldn't have done that. I've taken COVID more seriously than you.


agreeingstorm9

How can you not go to them? People are dead. The family needs to know they're supported.


morosco

Weren't you just lecturing me about taking COVID seriously? I can understand why losing "1 year" is no big deal when you've decided you don't need to make the sacrifices the rest of us have made. I haven't seen anyone I'm related to since 2019.


Werft

Then there's me and my friends who for the past year have went out partying, drinking, and enjoying life like we're meant to. Wanna know how many of us got covid? Zero. Plenty of hangovers though! You've wasted a year of your life in fear and anxiety and what have any of you gained except for some moral superiority?


featherruffler420

Im with you. 10 flights, vegas three times, Mexico, road trips, party towns. Since may 2020. No covid. No antibodies........ go figure?


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featherruffler420

Uh uh. I hope this post helped you feel better about whatever it is you're so angry about.


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Shredded2Death

wErE iN thE dIrEcT cEnTeR oF æ pAnDeMiC 🥴


Werft

Man I miss how empty flights were this time last year. Fly economy and get a whole row to yourself. It was amazing.


featherruffler420

Can't say I had the same. My first trip to Vegas May 2020 and the flight was absolutely packed


IHOP_007

You do realise that some (or all) of you could have gotten covid, had minimal or no symptoms and were the cause of someone's grandma/husband/wife/kid dying right?


morosco

If you've left the house, or ordered takeout, or went to a grocery store, you may have killed some grandmas too. The line of dead grandmas is grey and uncertain. But I do wonder how strict the lives of the people who love to talk about dead grandmas really are, and will be.


IHOP_007

Can't believe I need to explain this but: People need to eat to survive People do not need to go out partying and drinking to survive There fore the chances of you killing grandmas is higher if you go out **extra** times to party and drink


Siffi1112

> People do not need to go out partying and drinking to survive Yeah and Grandmas do not need to meet these people.


morosco

Have you truly done nothing but activities necessary to survive for the whole last year? >There fore the chances of you killing grandmas is higher if you go out **extra** times to party and drink What is the acceptable line for killing grandmas? Everybody needs to eat, but there different ways to acquire and prepare food that may impact the number of grandmas you kill on a daily basis. I tried to kill no more than 4 grandmas every day, taking calculated risks for my mental health occasionally.


Werft

I got a spreadsheet for calculating how many grandma's you kill per day on average.


morosco

That's pretty handy, it would make those moral calculations a little easier. If I am feeling on the edge and want to connect and have some beers outside with friends at a distance - and I KNEW that only killed, oh, 3 grandmas, I'd probably do it. At some point I can no longer trade my health for theirs. If it's 10 grandmas, its a tougher call.


Werft

Prove it. You can't, right? Because I didn't get Covid and I certainly didn't kill anyone. Is this really how all your conversations with people go, by the way? Accusing people of murdering children lmfao


IHOP_007

https://www.cdc.gov/mmwr/volumes/69/wr/mm6914e1.htm


featherruffler420

It is dude.... thats what these people do. Its their little platform while they have it....


Powerful-Egg-829

That feeling when your country now has more cases each day after months of being in lockdown and restrictions then when we first started the restrictions...


adotmatrix

And what country is this?


Powerful-Egg-829

Hungary


adotmatrix

My understanding is that strict lockdown measures only got put in place in Hungary last Thursday. It takes a bit for these measures to work.


MattBarnthouse

I picked a *bad* time to take a gap year to rebuild mental health/building a neat egg following my masters—- in May 2019. Now feel like 2 years of my life are gone. And getting a start is going to be that much harder. In a way, even feel four years behind as friends move forward in their jobs, build lives, while I’m living in my childhood bedroom. It sucks. It just sucks.


adotmatrix

This is the year that life was put on pause for everyone in at least one way. It’s going to take a while to grieve all the experiences we missed out on. Though I know it’s different for everyone, I hope you know you’re not alone in feeling “behind”. Scroll through the comments on this post and you will see what I mean. Wishing you luck on your path forward! Hopefully once you get started things will gain momentum and it becomes easier than how it appears now.


Powerful-Egg-829

i feel your pain. Maybe you could learn some new things or hobbies?


MattBarnthouse

I’ve been doing that. Gained clients. Enough to make ends meet. Barely. Just exhausted. Exhausted.


IHOP_007

I feel like this pandemic has changed me a lot as a person, but not really in a good way. I'm not an overly optimistic person, I tend to try and plan for every bad case scenario and assume things won't go my way (but still try, and hopefully be pleasantly surprised). I always had faith in people though and thought everyone had the potential to be a good, kind and thoughtful person. Some people end up in bad situations where they need to do not great things to either survive or guarantee some quality of life, but I was never for any sort of death penalty because nobody starts off (or is always going to be) a bad person. This might sound a bit naive but it's what I used to think, but I don't know anymore. ​ * We've had people running around refusing to have a small piece of cloth on their face because statistically they aren't going to die (just those old/at risk people you might come in contact with). * We've had governments lying to their citizens about potential cures or blocking relief and vaccine rollouts for political gain. * We've had people manipulating mask mandates for either increased tourism or political gain. * We've had massive bailouts for large business and almost zero help for small businesses. * We've had churches still keeping themselves open, and people (who apparently "love thy neighbour") not giving a shit about giving thy neighbour covid. * We've had people buying out cleaning supplies (and toilet paper) in order to resell on ebay for 100x the price. * We've had people blocking COVID testing for political reasons. * We still have people not giving a shit about COVID protocols inside stores and restaurants. * We've had countries blocking shipments of medical goods to other countries in need. * We've had people going on fucking vacation during the middle of of a global pandemic because they got "burned out." * We've had rich people buying up ventilators and flying/attempting to fly to foreign countries to escape (and spread) the virus. And I'm sure more things that I'm just forgetting. Some of these are excusable by people not having the knowledge base to understand, or by people being brainwashed by a religion/political party. However, after a certain point, it's really hard for me to not just face the facts that a lot of these people are just assholes. Assholes who will always be assholes regardless of education or opportunities.


GameOfThrownaws

This is very well put, and I've been experiencing the same sentiment throughout this. I, too, am someone who was always a bit of a pessimist, and I've never been a huge fan of "people". But HO-LEE-SHIT has this past year just kicked that up to a whole other level for me. I really think that will be the single thing from this entire ordeal that sticks with me the longest, maybe even forever. I will not soon forget the way people have behaved during this. SO. MANY. of them. More than I ever could've imagined.


JustLetMeComment

These thoughts plague me every single day. I finally quit my job because I couldn't stand being around people who didn't think it was real a couple weeks ago. I was doing better but a visit to a hardware store today plummeted me back to ground zero seeing yet more anti-maskers. There is no excuse of brainwashing at this point. Most people are monsters, and the cognitive dissonance of SOMEHOW still feeling a desire to help/be nice/generally give a shit being at odds with seeming to hate everyone around me is tearing me apart.


indarkwaters

I was talking about these very same things not long ago and my faith in humanity is really low and I keep thinking if this had been something far, far more deadly then we would be fucked.


JustLetMeComment

Don't worry, with these early re-openings and people's unwillingness to get vaccinated, we'll have more and more deadly variants every year!


indarkwaters

I am afraid you are right.


ProfessorPizza

I had my first child in January 2020. I quickly realized I had server postpartum anxiety. Needless to say it got way worse in March 2020. I started therapy in April 2020, and I'm doing much better. I just feel sad at times still that I didn't get the year I thought I would for my son's infancy. So many missed opportunities and outings. So many friends and relatives who haven't even met him yet.


colvi

Be strong, my wife went through the same and come out on the other side. Think of it this way, yes you missed a lot in the first year but did your child? Probably not we don’t remember what our first years were like, just know your child later in life will be greatful for the choices you made.


ProfessorPizza

Thank you so much. That is such a great point. :)


chirpyboyandbartjr

My brother started ranting about coronavirus in January of 2020. I ignored him at first but after about a month I could see what we were in for. I prepared to be in for at least three months but I anticipated 18 to 24 months. We have been fortunate that we have been able to stay in this whole time. I was pleasantly surprised that they were able to get a vaccine out as quickly as they did. Working remotely and schooling remotely has been tough but I am glad to have the ability to do so. I worry about the long term effects on my 6 year old son. When I lost my uncle to coronavirus in January it became very real to him. I am reminded how my grandmother was about the same age during the depression and how that shaped who she is for the rest of her life. It's not all bad but the anxiety is something that I hope will fade with time.


NormalComputer

For an entire year, the U.S. has been in a war mindset. The enemy is invisible, waiting to jump out at us, at every single local grocery store in town. I’m ready for this to end. Vaccines can’t come soon enough.


handcuffed_

Well they came, who needs testing anyways.


DonCorleone1992

All things considered I guess I'm pretty "lucky" Didn't lose any family or friends to COVID. Didn't lose my job, in fact I got a bonus check for showing up to work everyday during the height of the pandemic. But mentally this last year has taken its toll. I spent 2019 as a year of self improvement both physically and mentally. I felt like 2020 was going to be the year it was going to pay off. I started dating again and with pretty good success. Met a girl off Tinder the last weekend before COVID really hit. And it was wonderful. March 10th I had my second date with her and it just seemed this was going to be the start of something great. Then the World turned upside down. She worked as a bartender and lost her job and her mom got sick too, so she got overwhelmed by everything happening and cancelled our dates and pretty much dropped off communication. That was a tough break but even worse ones were still to come that week. I love sports and they were cancelled. I loved going to the gym. They were closed soon after. It was like every possible release and distraction I had from depression was ripped away from me. Eventually, I came to accept it all. By April I was feeling better and adjusted as well as possible to the "New Normal" and now I'm feeling hopeful for the future. But, I feel and I think I always will feel this. There's going to be a small part of me that'll always be in a "dark place" for not knowing what 2020 could've been in my life. What life I'd be living now if COVID was never a thing. I do know this though. I'm never taking little things like sports on TV and seeing friends for granted ever again.


OrdinaryOrder8

I can’t believe it’s been a year. It simultaneously feels like an eternity and no time at all has passed to me. Covid disrupted me going back to school for a different career (I just can’t do online classes). It’s also been hell as someone who has OCD, and hell for some of my friends suffering from depression and feeling isolated. I have a 90 y/o grandmother with multiple health issues who I’ve been worried about, still waiting to get the vaccine. Literally right before she would’ve gotten it, she got shingles and now has to wait for that to be gone to get her covid shot. I can’t wait for her and everyone to be vaccinated. I’m going to fly out to see her and give her a big hug ASAP.


Delicious_Delilah

I was going to go out the night quarantine began (St. Patrick's Day). I had 5 trips planned for last year, with one being a month after quarantine began. Instead, I stopped dating, only went out for groceries, stopped talking to humans for the most part, and laid in bed watching stuff/reading/playing on my Switch while depression and stress eating. I haven't left my apartment in over 3 months, but I'm venturing out on Wednesday (St. Patrick's Day) for a doctor's appointment and a trip to Walmart. Over the past year I've gained a ton of weight, my already my not great social skills declined, I've considered killing myself a few times, I've cried myself to sleep (I'm not a big cryer), my apartment turned into an Amazon warehouse, and my health has declined. I'm currently working on turning things around, but it's not easy because I have various roadblocks I need to get around. Leaving my apartment Wednesday is kind of big deal. I'm pretty anxious about it. Not because of covid so much even though the infection rate in my town is 1:8, but because my social anxiety that I spent 2 years fighting is back where it began. Possibly worse actually. So go me.


IHOP_007

Are you me? ​ Graduated University like a month before the pandemic started. Congratulations you finally made it through your degree now go sit at home because the job market is fucked oh and all those things you wanted to do after university? NAH


Delicious_Delilah

I'm sorry. That really sucks. At least it's nearly over so we can attempt to ease back into some kind of normalcy. I think it will take me awhile though. Unless my touch deprived ass gets drunk and invites a tinder boy over. I tend to go big or go home, and I'm already home.


IHOP_007

It might be nearly over for you guys in the states, but in Canada (with the current plan) it's going to be September/October till my age group gets the **first** vaccine. If we are counting the pandemic as starting a year ago then that means we are only 60ish% done with it here.


Delicious_Delilah

Hopefully that ramps up sooner rather than later. I can't figure out exactly why you guys are so behind. That estimate seems unacceptable to me.


IHOP_007

There is supposed to be a new plan on the 16th that takes into account two new vaccines getting approved for use in Canada. With all the shit that's gone down in this pandemic though it's hard for me to get my hopes up before any sort of official announcement though. Also with how spread out parts of the Canadian population is, it's hard to move vaccine to those at-risk communities (or bring them to a hospital if they get sick) so a lot of those communities are getting pushed to the front of the line. That's a **good** thing, and what they should be doing, but it pushes more people ahead of the "younger" age groups and thus we get moved farther back in line.


Delicious_Delilah

Ah, the geographical issues make a bit of sense. I didn't realize you guys were so spread out. Hopefully the announcement says that you'll be eligible soon. I know the feeling of just sitting Ave waiting for your life to resume. It fucking sucks, and there's not a ton you can you do about it. The lack of control is infuriating sometimes.


sand-which

Shit happens man I was feeling similar then got a therapist over zoom and feel a lot better. Worth looking into if you’re able


Delicious_Delilah

I have weekly therapy, but one of the things that happened in 2020 was my therapist of 3 years moving to another state. I'm currently getting to know my new therapist though. It will just take some time. I'm glad you reached out for help though. ❤️


AintEverLucky

not quite a year ago, March 21 of 2020, I saw [this "Final Warning" thread](https://www.reddit.com/r/texas/comments/fkdilf/psa_regarding_covid19_a_final_warning/) posted to the r/Texas subreddit. (I had started to get active with r/CoronavirusTX including live-blogging several of Gov. Abbott's early press conferences, and last April I joined that sub's "mod squad".) If you haven't looked this PSA over, perhaps because you any Texas connections, give it a whirl. It impressed me, and also scared the crap out of me, with its level of detail, its sourcing, balanced with its willingness to acknowledge it didn't have all the answers & that the situation was changing on a daily, sometimes hourly basis. Today, March 12 2021, I'm traveling to Galveston to see family I haven't seen in person since last June. I am fully vaxxed with my 2nd shot 2 weeks ago, and everyone in my immediate family has had at least one shot. We are so glad to be alive and relatively unscathed. God is good, but also "God helps those who helps themselves". It wasn't easy, staying the F home as much as possible, masking up, distancing, dropping plans for Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Years in favor of video calls. Not easy, but it was correct, and I'm grateful that it paid off.


Yaberflap

Worked as a live music venue technician for 3+ yrs before covid. I had just wrapped the most technically complicated show I had ever worked, I felt drained and angry at how I was being treated by management. My company decided to stay open as long as possible when the first restrictions hit. A week later every staff member was sacked. No time to sort things out, power down equipment, just boom. The last time I walked out of the venue was eerie. Nobody home. Empty cans everywhere. Lights left on. Fast forward a year later I work outside every day and I have learned many new skills. My career and outlook on life has changed completely. I can sew, solder, make bread and build a house. I’ve left the nightlife industry for good. I miss my band, I miss my friends and I miss sharing joints with people. I miss roaring laughter around a table. I hope this will be over soon.


Maideninwaiting

I live in NYC so I was in what is considered to be the epicenter of the pandemic, at least here in the U.S. My college and related colleges in the system closed down on the 11th in the afternoon or evening, I had already gone home by then as my class was in the morning. I remember thinking it wouldn't be so bad, we'd be back soon enough, and I'd graduate. Fast forward a year later, I did indeed graduate, cum laude somehow, but there was no ceremony. They gave us a little online booklet and diplomas months later in the mail. I haven't seen any of my friends since last March. Four of them got sick with covid, all recovered thankfully. But one of my friends from high school posted that her dad passed away from covid. One of my friends who got sick kept pressuring me to hang out with them, and they'd always wear their mask below their nose or not at all and did not socially distance. Even now, they don't know better and keep doing the same thing that got them sick in the first place, and is still pressuring me to see them. I told them I'm not comfortable doing so until I get my vaccine. I'm still waiting to get my vaccine, hopefully sometime in May as Biden just announced he'll mandate states to open it up to all adults by May 1st. I'm tired of staying in my room all day. My mental health is shot. Online graduate school sucks and I am tired all the time. I don't mind wearing a mask, I just want to be able to go out without fear of potentially getting exposed because some schmuck decided to not be careful. My mom is getting her first shot next Tuesday, and we're trying to persuade my grandma to get it. And as I've put in many posts before, more than anything, I want to be with my fiance. He lives in Germany, and we're both horrified by how the situation is there with the vaccines and everything. We're hoping to be together by fall, but there are so many unknown variables. We're trying to take things one day at a time, but it's often so hard to keep hope.


Donnie_de_la_Fae

Congratulations on graduating. I'm a Junior in undergrad this year, and my experience was very similar to yours. I hope that you take some time to enjoy yourself when things ease up, you deserve it.


crome66

I work on a popular adult animated series, and I used to have to drive to our parent studio and hand deliver copies of our finished episodes to tons of people in different buildings. I remember hearing talks around my smaller studio that things might get bad but it didn’t hit me until I drove to our parent studio. This absolutely massive lot with tons of buildings were almost all completely empty, except for us assistants. All the executives and producers had started working from home days before. It was raining that day, very rare for LA, so I remember it perfectly. That huge empty lot, silent and eerie. I went back and told my boss that nobody was there and he got this worried look on his face. I went home that night and never went back in to work, we started working from home that next day and have been since.


jmnugent

I haven't had time to read down through this thread yet.. but also been reflecting on this quite a bit. It's mindboggling to think about what "every day life" sort of things people were doing in Jan, Feb, March of last year.. and very few (if any) of us really realized how dramatically (and irreversibly) our lives were about to change. I caught Corona sometime in the late Feb / early March timeframe. Started isolating around March 13. Conditions slowly deteriorated and I called the Ambulance on myself around March 23. I spent 38 days (total) in the Hospital and 16 of those days were in ICU on a Ventilator fighting to stay alive. (16 days where I had non-stop "ICU Delirium" nightmares caused by the heavy sedatives). I woke up 12lbs lighter (due to muscle atrophy). Couldn't walk or talk. Had various tubes and such still in me (including a 3-port neck IV in the right side of my neck that I still have a scar from). Took me 12 days to go from Wheelchair to Walker to hiking pole to free-walking on my own again). Hospital Rehab Unit forced me to do a gym workout twice a day. I was climbing stairs in the Hospital (w/ my full size oxygen tank) as part of my exercise routine to get stronger and gain back my balance and such before they'd allow me to go back home (where I live alone). There's about 20 steps up to my 2nd floor apartment.. I remember when I first got home (still on full size oxygen tank). .I could only go up about 10 steps before I'd have to stop.. wait for my heart to stabilize.. before taking the next 10 steps. Getting home and plopping down in a chair,.. I had a crying breakdown because it just felt so weird to be home. There was this overwhelming feeling of "holy shit.. was the past 2 months just some awful bad dream ?"... Rehab and physical therapy was also a long hard road. At home nurses were coming to check my blood-levels and give me physical therapy exercises for about 3 months. I was on 2 medications (blood thinners and heart-stabilizers) for 6 months. So my entire treatment was roughly March 23 intake to April 28 release to Rehab and other followups into September. Friends and coworkers were very supportive and had keys to my apartment and would come (sometimes different people multiple times a day) to check up on me and give me support. They were all incredibly awesome. It's just ridiculous to think back on it all. I'm doing really great now. I'm on Day 259 of consecutively closing all my Apple Activity Rings,. and should get my 365 award sometime in late June. I'm averaging around 7.4 miles a day walked (around 16,000 steps). I've increased my VO2/Max from 29 back in May 2020 to 37 now (hoping to push it up into the 40's). I'm burning around 1,300 active calories per day (Active+resting, I'm totalling around 3,500 to 4,500 calories burned per day). I've sped up my walking pace from around 2.8mph to up around 3.5mph. I'm currently averaging around 110 min of exercise per day. I've also had both of my Pfizer vaccine shots now. It's just so super surreal to sit back and think about everything that's happened to me from March 2020 to March 2021. Some of those scars and memories are things I'll carry with me forever. Hopefully the good habits I learned of physical fitness and believing I can overcome anything,. are with me forever now too.


festiemeow

This was an incredible journey to read. Props to you for taking your health seriously!


frenchburner

Wow - there are no words - ICU Delirium sounds horrifying. So glad you’ve made such an amazing comeback, and wish you the very best future! FWIW, your current level of fitness is much higher than most people I know, myself included. Lol


jmnugent

Yeah.. the ICU Deliriums were absolutely crazy-pants. It was a really weird combination of: * Dreams that were exceedingly "normal" and mundane (things like "buying a new car".. which was weird when I woke up because some of those dreams felt so "normal" and "real".. I had to actually go back through Emails and txt-msgs,etc to convince myself it didn't actually happen. * other dreams were so nightmarishly bizarre (like Dr Strange surreal, people with swords threatening to kill me, witches and demons and etc) .. that (to some degree) I could just write them off as fantasy/imagination. But it was insanely trippy because it was like "being trapped in a carnival of mirrors" with no way out. Also trippy because there wasn't really any sense of "passing time".. it was just sort of like I was just "there" in a no mans land. I had no awareness of the outside world,. and no idea if anyone else even existed or not (or whether they were doing anything to try to save me or not). And then one day you just "wake up".. and start fading back into normal reality (as the heavy-sedatives slowly wear off). Re-orienting myself to "normal reality" was a bit like "rebooting".. and watching all my various systems start to come back online. I couldn't really talk or move at 1st. All I could do was watch Nurses come and go and check my fluids and change my bedpan ,etc. Then slowly I could move my arms and legs. Start rasping out 1 or 2 words and etc. It took a couple days to be able to sit up in bed and have normal conversations. But yeah. .the physical Rehab and getting into a daily fitness groove at home and in daily life has been a big "Win". There's more I could do (cutting out Soda and sweets and other hardcore changes if I really wanted to get super-strict about it). It's just crazy to sit back and comprehend all the things I've survived over the past year or so. I've had some tough times in my life before (I'm 47yrs old now).. but the past year pretty much takes the cake at the moment.


frenchburner

Wow, those definitely sound crazy-pants (great saying, BTW)! I wish I knew how our minds work to produce dreams because some are absolutely insane. Lol The worst part would be “being there but *not* being there. Here’s wishing no further cakes are awaiting you in the future...well, except really tasty, frosting-heavy ones. And cupcakes.


thecrow32

Here in the Philippines, lockdown started on the 9th of March. A day after my birthday. At the time I thought this was great because I had a week off to rest and catch up on school work I had. Little did I know that March 9 was the last time I'd ever get to be with my friends. I was full of hope that this will blow over like the H1N1 or other viruses but as the months went on and things got progressively worse, I genuinely started losing hope. Now, I've managed to cope better but not by much. A lot of my relationships have badly deteriorated and my mental health has honestly gone so bad that I'm genuinely worried about how I'll be after this is all actually over. Here's to hoping this time next year, things will actually be back to normal.


minordomo_ashkandi

It looks like we're on the cusp of this whole horrible thing being over, and my thoughts turn to those future celebrations. Bars open, concerts, festivals, almost as if we've all returned victorious from a war in a fara-way land. Except not all of us returned. I hope people take a moment in their first celebrations to acknowledge those who didn't "come home" as it were. Maybe realize we can go back to the common places, but we won't ever really return to normal.


[deleted]

I got my first Pfizer vaccine shot today. First thing I saw on IG after getting home was an article with a picture of a bunch of body bags. I felt so bad--because you're right, we're not coming back with everyone. 525,000 people (in the US alone) is a lot to fathom, but each person was somebody to somebody.


ridgegirl29

my neighbors lost their dad. My friend lost his fiance very early on. My best friend almost lost her grandmother a year after she lost her grandfather. I'm so lucky that my parents and grandparents are okay. none of us even caught covid. but I know that we were fortunate. I'm never taking that for granted ever again


sand-which

I’m tearing up reading this thread right now. So many of us are just about at the end but you’re 100% right


lew161096

I remember laughing it off in February with a friend. I thought the whole issue was being exaggerated in the news and it was going to blow over like swine flu.


Coffeecor25

The Swine flu, Zika, Mad Cow, ebola, etc. there have been countless “misses” over the past decade or two that, I think, lead to the western world not taking this seriously at all. Every new disease outbreak was covered as if it was going to be the big one so nobody was prepared when the big one actually came. I ended up taking this more seriously than most people I know but even I remember totally blowing it off and even joking around about it as well. I remember being at a restaurant with some friends in February and making the stupid requisite “you got the ‘rona!” joke when one person ordered a beer. It just seemed like it would never happen here - or if it did, it certainly wouldn’t stop society as we know it. I’ve learned my lesson.


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RealNaked64

My guess is that the contagiousness of Covid is what set it apart from the others. I can't think of another disease that can be transferred so easily. Also a significant amount of blame has to come from the governments of the affected countries. If society shut down completely for 3 weeks, Covid would have dwindled. But no one wanted to take the necessary precautions and put a lid on this whole thing. Hindsight is 20/20, but I can't help but laugh at all the people who were yelling "You can't shut down the world for 2 weeks!" Oh, we can't? Let's slow things to a crawl for over a year, is that better?


norafromqueens

Same, I remember in January, I honestly thought it was media hysteria, especially because our media tends to be sinophobic. I thought it was like a news piece to make China look bad. I remember joking around telling people they should take advantage of cheap flight deals. Fast forward only a month and I was like shit!


RealNaked64

I remember people *actually* taking advantage of the travel deals! Going to Mexico, England and elsewhere without a care in the world. Crazy how they snuck in and out of there before the major shutdowns began


Indigo_Sunset

The thing about 'people' who generally don't care about what other people think about their internal process is that when something truly screwed has happened, you'll see the effort to control fallout from the event even if it doesn't get talked about. So when a country like China locks down 1/10th of the worlds population at 700 000 000 people, there's shit going down, regardless of anything else or anyones broadcast thoughts on the matter. As soon as that happened the writing was on the wall for the direction of this event.


norafromqueens

I mean, I definitely took it more seriously once it went to Korea because I have family there. We were worried for them and was like, whoa, this is spreading around and is real. Ironically, a few weeks later, I realized Korea had nothing to worry about (relatively speaking) and the US was in a world of shit.


[deleted]

On March 11th, nothing important happened to me except checking the news on the pandemic. On March 13th, my school was closed after a huge rise in cases in my city. My country went under lockdown on March 26th. This year, on March 13th,(yeah tomorrow), I'm graduating high school. My entire senior year was online and so will be my graduation. Haha. Sucks to be me.


ActualFaithlessness0

March 11th is the day my college shut down and courses went online for the rest of the semester. I was on spring break. If you'd told me when I left campus on March 6th that I would not return for another year and a half, I wouldn't have believed you. I was already considering a leave of absence, as I was just beginning to treat my many mental health issues that had made my first year a dumpster fire, but the pandemic and getting incompletes in my online courses made it an easy decision. My neighborhood was the epicenter of the first wave. I hid in my home and listened to the constant wail of sirens. My brother and uncle both have disabilities and live in group home settings, and we were unable to see them for months. The virus tore through the nursing home where my grandmother was living and took her life on April 16th, 2020. My dad is high-risk and works in a hospital setting, and I was terrified that the pandemic would make me an orphan. One year later, neither of us have gotten sick, and vaccine eligibility just opened up to his age group (although he's waiting to get the J&J vaccine). I have five months before I go back to school. I'm just starting to see a light at the end of this tunnel.


lacourseauxetoiles

I still can't believe it took them that long to designate it as a pandemic. Honestly though, I'm just excited that I hopefully will be able to have a normal summer. I know so many people have gone through worse this past year, but I still missed out on my senior year of college. I had my internship program canceled and wasn't able to get my dream internship over the summer. I haven't gone on a date in over a year, haven't been to a party in over a year, and haven't had an in-person class in over a year. I didn't get to do the service projects I wanted to do or go on a fun vacation or do in person research. If there hadn't been a pandemic, I would have been hanging out with people every single day, all the time. I wanted to be going to concerts, conventions, clubs, bars, and all of the stuff I just can't do anymore, and I just can't wait until I get to do that again.


Dalmatian_In_Exile

Man I just want the gyms to open. Went from working out 5/6 times a week to running once a week. Fuck me it feels like all is gloom (European here so not even vaccination is going as planned).


BFeely1

Do the operators of the gym(s) you worked out at want to get all their shots?


nivenkos

Gyms are forcibly closed by the governments in most of Europe.


BFeely1

Doesn't answer the question. Vaccinations should definitely be a key part of reopening.


roxadox

A whole year, god damn. It was a year ago now that my fiancé's and my plans to reunite after 9 months apart got fucked up. We haven't seen each other since June 2019. Thankful that the US is killing it with the vaccines and chances are we will be able to see each other later in the year.


SureJanuary

I lost my dad and grandma, gained a lot of weight, depressed, unemployed but hey at least i graduated with honors. My life is in the dumpster, in hindsight 2019 was my peak year.


indarkwaters

Congrats on graduating with honors. I’m sorry you lost your dad and grandmother. 💙


SureJanuary

Thank you ❤️


BrotherKaramazov

I was always an anxious fellow, but this year completely destroyed me. I think I have developed a derealisation syndrome, but I can't get any free therapists because, surprise surprise, everyone else is also fucked up. I think about death and meaningless of life all the time. I was never suicidal but now I am keeping this option open. I drink and do drugs much more than I did before. I am still surprisingly functional and successful in my work, but I know that my field is going to suffer even more than it did. If I loose doing what I love and this pandemic is still around, I don't think I want to be alive anymore. Meanwhile my country is developing into a fashist dystopia and because of pandemic we are not allowed to protest, we can't do anything. A couple of my friends died in last two years and I envy them so much. I used to be a man of science, now I irrationally hate science and scientist because I feel it is their fault that we have such strict measures. (I know I am wrong, but still). Every day feels like a chore. Every day feels worse. I have lost trust in EU, the only political institution that seemed beneficial to my country. I don't see and end to this pandemic, I simply don't. I don't think it will ever end. And when it does, my life will never be the same and I will never again be happy as I was. But I am glad we helped to flatten the curve. Just 14 more days. Just 14 days left.


jirenlagen

Hang in there. If you wish to chat, my inbox is open. Can’t relate to the depression aspect but my anxiety has definitely been expounded by this virus and I don’t really see that ending anytime soon.


[deleted]

[удалено]


BrotherKaramazov

Thank you


BrotherKaramazov

Thank you for your kindness. I am still far far away from thinking about ending things, I think it came off too gloomy in my post, but this detachment from reality is taking its toll, I guess.


minordomo_ashkandi

I think we all feel the immense weight of this right there with you. Sometimes victory is just getting out of bed and putting one foot in front of the other. Things will get better!


BrotherKaramazov

Thank you! I already feel better because of people like you


neriisan

Overall it was a decent year. I hated the fact that I missed out on a year of college. (due to it being remote and remote college is so bad it doesn't count as education.) I spent many of my years homeless, and 2020 brought me a lot of money in my bank, as well as a fixed credit score, some bit of education, and a stable job at the time. I was also in Japan for 4 months at the time, and that was a lot of fun! Overall my life changed a lot for the better. I just wish covid didnt make me study remotely.


JohnJoe-117

I was in Ireland on the Study Abroad trip of my dreams. I had been saving up money since I was 15 to go. That year in high school had been my lowest point in life due to a lot of reasons, and I was about to go down a dark path in life. My Mom saved me by convincing me that if I worked hard enough, I could get to Study Abroad like she did. My family is all from Ireland (mom is the only American) and my dad owns his family home in Galway, but we haven't been able to afford to go since I was 4. Studying abroad become my new pipedream. I pulled back my grades from the brink for the next two years and was able to get an insane scholarship for my first choice of college. When I finally got to Ireland... man, it was like being in a dream. I had always felt a calling to the place, but that wasn't what made it so wonderful. I made it that way. I had worked so many summers busting my ass with the carpenters, bricklayers, painters, ect. making enough money to pay for college and then the trip. I didn't take a second for granted. In my time in Limerick, I made the fastest and strongest friendships of my life. I met a girl there too. I got to drink my first legal beer. I got to go to my first nightclub. And yet, all the while, I had a feeling that this virus in China was going to become more problematic than people thought. I was right. This coming Saturday marks a full year since I had to leave Ireland. It has been a shitty year since then. But my family and I survived it. We are luckier than many people in that regard. Things are getting better. God bless ya.


snowdorf

Your story made me both happy and bummed. Happy that you got to go to Ireland, bummed about the price you had to pay to ensure you went, in terms of being in a bad place. Poopy you had to come back early by the sounds of it. Super grateful that you were able to do something that big and meaningful on your own. I admire your courage and wish you well.


Cyndere

S/O was in the hospital overseas and l was regretting not just spending the money to see her. Little did we know, these checks were coming our way a few weeks later... I was also thinking that I could have been on the same plane as that American who attended a church service in NZ and spread the disease to the congregation if l had decided to just travel before the lockdown commenced. I still have regret about that because l had plans to get engaged last year and get married this year. 2020 ruined everything and almost ruined my relationship. 2020 was just like living in suspended animation and hoping I didn't catch COVID. Thankfully, my area isn't as bad as real cities like Houston, NYC, etc.


jirenlagen

I am finally nearing the point where hopefully I can stress less. My dad and I and a bunch of other extended family are fully vaccinated. My mom got her first shot yesterday. Just need to secure one for my partner. This whole year I spent anxious and stressed that this stupid virus was going to kill all my loved ones. Very close to the point where I can say, F you COVID we won! We survived!


the_real_ak

I was about to fail out of college, I was taking rigorous courses and had C’s and D’s, transitioned to online format and made deans list.


ZenCannon

I had been working from home for 9 years before COVID hit, so aside from some minor issues, my professional life didn't really change. I'm very lucky in that regard. I saw the reports of panic buying in Asia and figured that my wife and I should stock up as well. I remember walking into Costco before the first lockdowns in California and seeing other people quietly stocking up too. When the stay in place orders were announced, it felt like the world had turned upside down. When I went out to get groceries, the streets were eerily quiet compared to before. My wife and I saw the wider adoption of WFH forced by the pandemic and decided that we had to buy a house. We closed in July 2020. This was probably the biggest change to our lives, and again, I feel lucky to have been a ot to do this. We were homebodies even before COVID, so we were perfectly happy to stay at home. I'll say that we're looking forward to getting the vaccine and leaving the house more often, though. My opinion of people in general has worsened because of COVID. I remember, when we were moving in the middle of the pandemic and California's wildfire season, seeing maskless people sitting outside at Starbucks. It blew my mind that people were so determined not to wear masks that they would risk both the disease and also breath in wildfire smoke. In short, I made it out okay, mostly because it wasn't a big disruption to my daily life. Again, I feel very fortunate, and I'm grateful for the people out there who are making it so that I can stay at home and stay safe.


MC620

this thread is a very good read. i enjoy reading all of your stories. march 11th impacted everyone on this planet in some way, and i am not sure it will be forgotten for some time. i empathize with y’all as this last year has definitely been the worst period of my life. but just like with the pandemic itself, it appears things are starting to look better. time will certainly tell. i’ll never forget sitting in my car before class (in late february) and reading about how wuhan started having ppl wear masks in public. i actually shrugged it off and felt like it would never even be half as bad in the US. a combination of things - history, as well as other big diseases (sars, h1n1, ebola) - had me thinking we would not even come close to the “worst case scenario”. we almost never do. it just doesn’t happen. unfortunately, it did. but there is nothing you could have told me on march 11th, 2020 about the following twelve months that i would have believed. i’ll never forget the first day of ohio’s stay-at-home order at the end of march. i met with some friends in a kroger parking lot to get something from them ... we live in a relatively populous suburb. as soon as i left my neighborhood, i could tell everything was different. very few cars on the road at rush hour on a thursday. i’ve never seen anything like it and i don’t think i want to ever again. i’ll never forget the optimism that things would be fine “in a few months”. particularly in sports, i remember early on that postponements would be brief ... iirc MLB expected that they would be able to start their season a month later than they originally planned. there were murmurs that march madness could still happen, but in late april or may. my friends and i even bought music festival tix for august, expecting things to be fine by then. my college, and several other in ohio, originally planned to have online classes for two weeks or so (my school decided to switch to online for the rest of the semester only two days after announcing it would only be for two weeks lol). it’s funny to look back at now obviously, but i’ll never forget how hopeful we all were at the start of the pandemic. there are a lot of things i’ll never forget and there are a lot of things i hope **to** forget. i could go on and on about these past 365 days, but i don’t have the time or space lol. i hope we never have to experience something like this ever again. i hope that these next 365 days treat you so much better than the previous 365.


itsbecomingathing

My daughter was 4 months old and I was just coming out of the fourth trimester haze. I felt more comfortable taking her out of the house, going to postnatal yoga, story time at the library, gearing up to meet mom friends. March 13th is the day my state shut down. I still have “Dinner at M & J’s” in my calendar. We decided to postpone dinner that night. It all felt like a joke at first. I felt prepared to bunker down for another two weeks (just like the hungry caterpillar) and figured I didn’t even go out to the movies, sports games, restaurants... so what me worry? Then my husband started working from home. I didn’t have any child care relief because I couldn’t leave the home (except for walks) or drop her off at her grandparents. Her socialization was me. I snuck into a lot of parks. We took a lot of selfies. I was tense every time I walked into a store. I still am. We finally saw her grandparents on Mother’s Day. My MIL gifted me a pulse oximeter. I missed out on meeting new mom friends but my Reddit baby bumper group is still going strong, and we post regularly so I have my online group. It’d be interesting to see what would happen if we met in person though.


ContraCelsius

I still remember the Surgeon General tweeting about how masks "are not effective": https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/factcheck/2021/02/17/fact-check-ex-surgeon-general-jerome-adams-reversed-position-masks/6765301002/ Fool me once, shame on, uh, me. Fool me twice, shame on, uh,... Can't get fooled again.


mazelltovcocktail

My life felt like it was just beginning to go well. I was a senior in high school, with a trip planned for spring break and a fun second semester in the works. I was excited for college, and saying goodbye to friends and mailing it in for classes. I never graduated. All I wanted was that cathartic release of 4 very hard years. I never saw a lot of my friends and teachers again. And college sucks during a pandemic.


icomehere2cope

I am sad that I accomplish basically nothing all year.


HamlindigoBlue7

You survived. That’s all that matters.


yong598

This year was about surviving, not thriving


Monkey1Fball

This is strictly a personal anecdote ..... but March 11, 2020 was a big day for me personally. I accepted a new job that would take me from Denver to Los Angeles, a new company, a new adventure. I made the acceptance call at 5 PM MT. Within 2 hours, the NBA had shut down, travel to Europe had been suspended, the world began to shut down. One year later, I'm still working remote from Denver. It's been a difficult year.


hdpq

Do you still have that LA job?


Monkey1Fball

Yes, still have the LA job. I did start in April, I've just been working remote from Denver. From a strictly financial POV, things are the best they've ever been. I'm making a SoCal salary (I would have accepted a reduction due to cost-of-living during the remote period, but they definitely weren't going do to that). But I'm being taxed at Colorado rates, living in a lower cost-of-living city. That said --- there's more to life than $$$. Overall, things are not as good as I wished they could be.


ediblestars

What a year. It's really funny how introducing one fairly straightforward problem--humans can't come too physically close together--can upend society so thoroughly. Cheers to all of you, to this sub, and to all those we've lost.


jirenlagen

I really liked how despite how antisocial or plugged in our culture is that this reinforced how IMPORTANT face to face personal interactions and relationships actually are. Zoom, video chat etc is NOT a valid replacement and in my lifetime at least, really never will be. My motto following this especially when socializing with people I rarely see is going to be “put the phone down it can wait” “be present, be all there,”


tha_oz

Bro it feels like i'm still in 2020, and it's a long ass year.


[deleted]

I was one week in of returning to my routine of working out and going to the gym. I was doing so well. Waking up super early to head to the gym, ate well, and even stopped smoking for that week and felt a million times better. Then the lockdown happened and gyms were closed so I had to adapt at home looking up videos of non-equipment workout routines. Unfortunately with how grim the situation turned out, I started being apathetic and picked up smoking again and started to eat badly which is a huge risk considering the virus and have been that way for the rest of the year. Just two and a half weeks ago, I broke my smoking habit and finally stopped smoking. But I still lack the will to find a consistent workout routine that doesn’t require me to go to the gym. I am walking 10k steps each day, but I still have problems of eating anything. My grandpa passed away last week because of COVID and I have many friends who have contracted the virus. Regardless of people’s views of the virus, we are living in history. My grandpa’s death was preventable because he was a few years off of having priority for the vaccine and now the requirement have come out of pushing for more adults to get it. Just one more fucking month and my grandpa would still be alive. He had a good 20 years left in him too. Yes he had conditions, especially from having a liver transplant a few years ago. That doesn’t mean people can rationalize his death as “his time is up” no his death was fucking preventable and people who rationalize these deaths don’t get to choose the free will of others by spreading this virus.


indarkwaters

I am so sorry about your grandfather. 💙 quitting smoking was the BEST thing you could do for yourself even more so than working out. It’s no small achievement. Congrats. Stay healthy.


Seaworthinessthe1st

My condolences about your grandfather :( I wanted to say that I quit smoking over the summer and it gets so much better before you know it. I hope you stick with it. Good luck!


vilebubbles

It's been really hard. My husband and I saved for years to have a house and start a family. I got pregnant in October of 2019. I knew covid was coming thanks to reddit and began preparing a little, buying dry foods and dog food and asking my work to buy sanitizer and lysol and masks. They said no. My husband thought I'd gone nuts. Everyone did. It was like a tornado was heading straight for us but I'm the only one who could see it and everyone was laughing at me for seeing it. In March, roughly 5 months pregnant, my husband and I both got furloughed without pay 3 days apart from each other. He got called back into work a month later with reduced hours and no bonuses this year. I wouldn't get called back until months later, 6 weeks after having my baby, from March to August I made no income other than 7 weeks of unemployment, which was very very helpful. But all of our savings are gone. All of them. We barely made it with the house payment and car payment and 10k in medical bills from my baby and I. Our dog needing lots of vet care (getting neutered, vaccines, bloodwork), etc. I've had to sell about 20% of my clothes and things around the house to afford groceries. I've done some sort of sketchy stuff to make ends meet. Thank God for my mom who saved us from losing our home and our car and was able to help us a few times, she's truly an angel. I didn't get to have the baby shower I'd always dreamed of for my first and maybe only baby. We did a zoom shower, which maybe half of my family showed up for =/. I found out my baby's gender alone. I did the ultrasounds alone. Sitting there waiting on them to tell me if my baby was OK after some abnormalities, alone (he was OK), when my baby stopped kicking for hours and I had to go to the hospital, I had to go alone. Baby, husband, and I spent a week in the hospital and no one could see us. It really upset me not having my mom there for the birth. But only one person allowed. I went back to work after 6 weeks unpaid, only to be cursed out and fake coughed on and threatened by antimaskers. My husband's family talks shit about me now, they used to love me, because I made them wear a mask when they came to see baby. My aunts, uncles, cousins, friends, didn't get to come meet my baby. I didn't get to do all the new mom stuff I wanted to do. I would've had at least 10 different women willing to come help, now it's only my mom, who once again is my rock, but she has to work and stuff too. It's been an incredibly lonely and hard year. Before I could just take my baby to the doctor anytime I thought even the slightest thing seemed wrong. Now I have to decide if getting covid is riskier than not going (were in one of the top 10 cities for covid). I've tried to make some money repainting and fixing old and ugly furniture, which I actually love doing, I've made a few sales but it's sort of dried up now. I just want my baby to have a normal life. I want him to meet his cousins. I want to take him to the grocery store and fight off little old ladies trying to kiss him or be embarrassed as he throws a tantrum because I won't get him a toy. Instead we sit in the house =(. When I first got pregnant we bought all these fun things for our family and friends to come celebrate after his birth, a little fireplace, a mini blow up pool for the kids and baby to splash in, we were going to throw a party and I'd finally get to have a drink and celebrate. All that stuff is still sitting in the garage. I refuse to sell it even though I know I could because I still dream of that day. Thanks for reading my novel.


okawei

People can be so cruel. Imagine not wanting to see your newest member of the family because you had to wear a mask...I legit don't understand how people can be that selfish.